Watching Your Child Perform

A wonderful 9 year old pitcher took the mound on Monday. Dressed in his "Rockies" uniform he confidently warmed up and was ready to pitch his one inning of relief in a hotly contested match up against the Cardinals. Starting with a strikeout, he quickly fell behind the next hitter and when he walked him, the nerves showed through. Another walk and some frustration brought his coach (and father) to the mound. "Remember you leg kick and slow yourself down" were the words of wisdom from Dad. The inning continued with a couple of infield hits and a couple of runs given up and the 9 year old was deflated. "No worries" said his coach, "This was your first time pitching against live hitting. You did well." Oh the pressure of being perfect! This 9 year old had to be perfect for himself and everyone watching.
It is hard and wonderful to be a parent watching your children perform whether it be on the field, stage or wherever. You want to take the difficulty out the situation and make it go well for them, but you can't. The effort put into the performance makes it worthwhile. The challenge for parents is to not live vicariously through their child's experiences and allow them to struggle through these performances.
The next time on the mound that 9 year old struck out three and walked one without the dad/coach there. No living vicariously on this occasion. There might be a lesson in that too.